Herding Cats: How to Keep Your Troop On Task And Out of Trouble

One question or topic that frequently makes the rounds on leader Facebook pages, particularly those aimed at Daisy and Brownie leaders, is how do you maintain order and keep the girls on task. Over the years, through trial and error, I've learned a few tricks I'd like to share with you today.  The main thing to remember though, is that it is far easier to MAINTAIN control than it is to REGAIN it.

Keep Them Busy

That is the #1 rule for small kids--give them something to do.  For the most part, if Brownies and Daisies do not have something to do, they'll find something to do, and it often involves running around the room.  If you aren't okay with that, you need to provide an alternative.  

If your meeting time/place is such that girls are being dropped off over 10-15 minutes, your meeting plan should include some "bellringer" activity--something the girls can do without much direction from you and which, preferably, can be put down at any time to finish later (or not).  Examples are play doh (the stuff is cheap, buy some for your troop supplies), coloring sheets or, if you have them and are willing to share with the troop, blocks or Legos.

Have your meeting planned and move from one activity to another.  Downtime is playtime, and once they start to play (and run around) getting them back  is tough.

Have a Routine

Especially with younger kids, knowing what to expect next keeps them focused.  Does Suzi not like coloring?  She's a lot more apt to sit down and give it some effort if she knows the crayons are going to be picked up in a few minutes. If heading toward the flag at ten minutes after the hour always means getting into a horseshoe and saying the pledge, then the process gets easier each week. When we always have closing circle after snack, they don't have a reason to think they'll be there much longer. 

Keep Leader Talk to a Minimum

I've been doing this for over fifteen years.  I've NEVER had a girl come in and ask "Ms. Ruth, what are you going to talk about today?".  They want to know what they are going to DO.  If you are talking/teaching and the girls aren't paying attention, it is time to move on to something else. If the girls "never listen" when you______, quit ______ing.  Honestly, that's advice I wish anyone who speaks in public would take--if your audience isn't paying attention, there is no point in continuing to talk.  If the girls don't like the Daisy stories, find something else to do.  

Keep Girl Talk Focused and Moving

Participating in task-oriented group discussions is an important skill and part of being girl-led.  However, as a leader, you need to know when to say when.  If girls aren't listening to each other there is no point in having a discussion.  Shut it down and move on to something else.

Break your discussion topics down into as many individual pieces as  you can think of, so that the girls' responses are short.  Instead of trying to plan a whole TAP in one 30 minute discussion, have one talk where you pick who you want to help, another where each girl states a need or a problem, and another where you come up with ideas to solve the problem.  

Use Your Quiet Sign

Yes, it really does work, especially with little ones.  Raise your hand and stand there, and point to girls who get quiet and raise their hand--thank you, thank you, I really like the way you use the quiet sign, good job....

I have a loud voice that carries well and I'm not afraid to use it, when necessary.  However, as someone who was a HORRIBLE first year teacher many years ago, I can tell you that while raising your voice works the first time, and even the second, eventually, you become the lady who yells, and no one pays attention to it anymore.   Yelling just makes you look out of control, which isn't what you want.

Try Touch

We all have the girl who just can't sit still, who talks at inappropriate times and /or can't keep from annoying the other girls.  Sometimes the best way to manage her behavior is a hand on her shoulder.  It reminds her that you are there and that she should be quiet, sit still etc. without calling her out or making a fuss. 

Vary Activities

 Girls who are happily engaged in what they are doing are rarely discipline problems. Girls who are waiting, bored, or who hate what you are doing very much can be.  No leader can please all of the girls all of the time but try to include a variety of activities in your meeting plans.  Coloring is okay, but not for an hour.  Songs are great, but don't try to teach three new ones in one meeting.  Most girls love an active game, but they aren't going to spend 30 minutes playing duck, duck, goose.

Build In a Bathroom Break

The need to use the restroom is contagious.  When one has to go; many do, whether for the fun of the outing or because they really have to go.  This is where a routine comes in handy.  My usual routine is arrival activity, opening circle, leader-directed activity/games and then a craft or other seated activity, during which the girls can chat.  We finish with snack and closing circle.  We make a bathroom run (the bathroom is in another building) right after I give directions for the seated activity.  Since the girls know it is coming, they either don't ask to go earlier, or are easily put off until that time.  If for some reason I change the routine, I do get bathroom requests at bad times, but since I've anticipated this, I am able to tell them when they can do and it is generally not a problem.

Don't Try to Do Too Much

If you check VTK you'll find that it uses two meetings to earn most Brownie badges, but that there are generally activities in the meeting plan that, while related to the topic,do not directly meet any badge requirements.  Many leaders will tell you they manage a badge per meeting.  My suggestion is to have a bag full of tricks  you can pull out when/if necessary, but keep the amount of planned work reasonable.  If you are trying to rush the girls through something so you can move on to the next thing, you and they are going to end up frustrated, especially Polly the Perfectionist (and most of us have one of those).  If most of the girls are still happily working on their ____, just let them be, and do XXX next time.  

Be Prepared

I know that some leaders come straight from work into a room where First Grade was in session ten minutes before they get there.  That can't be helped, and I understand that. However, to the extent you are able to arrive early, set out materials and arrange your space, do so.  If you are digging through your bag looking for something as girls arrive, or have downtime while you locate materials, or are trying to set up while girls are there, you are setting the stage for chaos.  

I hope it goes without saying that you should plan your meeting more than ten minutes before you arrive and make sure you have all needed materials.  

Praise Good Behavior

Thank the girls who do what they are told when they are told to do it.  Little ones generally want to please and if you thank Suzie for sitting quietly on the rug, Jenni will try to get you to praise her too.

Get the Parents Involved--and Make the Girl Own the Behavior

If I have a consistant problem with "Kate" and I've tried other methods, one thing I do is to grab the girl and the parent at pick up time and tell the girl that she needs to tell her parent why I had to fuss at her at the meeting.  That makes sure we all know why Ms.Ruth isn't happy and what she needs to do to correct that.  I had a girl a few years ago who was a constant behavior problem, and had to use that technique.  After the next meeting I also grabbed the girl and her mom and told the girl to tell mom what I fussed at her about at today. The girl's whole body deflated and I could tell she had no idea so I whispered in her ear "nothing", and so she got to tell mom that as well, and she glowed.   

Think Twice Before Starting PBIS

What about Daisy Dollars or Brownie Bucks or Girl Scout Gold or .... ?  Most schools today use some kind of "PBIS" system that has teachers handing out tokens for positive behavior and the kids using the tokens to buy prizes, and some leaders swear by it.  However, once you start that,you have yet another process to manage during meetings and yet another thing to keep up with.  While I can see the system helping to motivate a child who doesn't really want to be someplace like school, girls are supposed to want to be in GS and should be having fun while there.  If that is true, then appropriate behavior should not have to be rewarded beyond the fun of the activities.  If it isn't true, put your effort into improving the meetings, not into running some complicated system. 

For me, the bottom line is that girls who are interested in and engaged in what we are doing are able and willing to behave in the manner I expect for the length of our meeting. If there is some special need I interface with the parent to come up with a solution for that girl.

Image by Алексей Боярских from Pixabay